True Meaning
by Selfish Desires
Summary: We don't know what happened. He was fine one minute, and the next...He snapped. Yusuke's voice had wavered as he spoke these words to Kurama over the telephone.  Slight HxK! Suicide! DON'T LIKE? DON'T READ!  **Old Story;Old Style;Rewrite coming soon?**


I wrote this story on a whim, Im please with how it came out I just think i rushed it a bit. I may come back and edit it

**True Meaning**

**Pairing: **KuramaX Hiei

**Rating:** M

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Kurama had never expected the words that had passed Hiei's lips just two nights before. _"...I think I love you Kurama."_

The red headed fox sat alone in his room, his arms folded and resting on a small work desk before him. Tired emerald eyes blinked in an effort to stay open as the fox allowed his thoughts to drift, his mind swiveling with pictures of the past night.

_"We don't know what happened. He was fine one minute, and the next...He snapped."_ Yusuke's voice had wavered as he spoke these words to Kurama over the telephone. That day Kurama had a uneasy feeling in his gut, a feeling he just couldn't get to go away. When Yusuke spoke again his heart froze, his eyes widening in sudden realization of what he had done. _"He's gone...Hiei's Dead."_

Kurama's world collasped as he allowed the telephone to slip from his numbing fingers. _'Hiei...Dead...But...How?_' Kurama's body sagged, slowly scraping against the wall as he fell into a sitting position. Hiei was dead, and It was all his fault. Running his now completly numb fingers through his tangled bangs Kuramas breathe grew ragged as he choked back the tears that threatened to escape. Kurama was so far gone in his grief that he couldn't comprehend Yusuke's worried voice booming from the phone. "_Kurama? Kurama! I'm on my way over, just please answer me."_ Once again picking the phone up, Kurama hiccuped as he said in a deathly soft voice. "It's my fault Yusuke. I killed Hiei." The detective on the other end of the line didn't get a chance to respond as Kurama ripped the phone cord from his wall, tossing the now useless phone across the room as tears burst from his eyes.

_"I killed him. I killed Hiei."_ Kurama repeated this several times to himself, resting his head on his knee's as tears rolled down his soft porciline-like cheeks. His body heaving from the fierceness of his crying, Kurama had allowed himself to roll over onto his side and fall into a nightmare plagued sleep.

---

_"Hiei, I respect you as a freind and a battle partner...But I just don't like you that way."_ Kurama's gaze was locked with that of the crimsoned eyed fire demon as he tried his best to softly reject his best friends confession of love. But even as hard as he tried not to hurt his friend, Kurama could see the pain and rejection play across Hieis face, "Please don't let this effect our friendship Hiei."

Breaking the silent battle of wills, Hiei drifted his gaze from Kurama's eyes to the bedroom window. "Hn."

A small smile splayed itself across Kurama's face as he rose from where he sat on his bed. "Im very pleased Hiei. Now will you be staying the night?"

Blood red eyes looked between the fox and the window. Quickly grabbing his Katana which had been leaned against the wall that lay below the window frame, Hiei quickly fastened it to his belt before pushing the window opened. "I'm busy." When the fire demon made to flee out the window, Kurama gently gripped his forearm.

"You are coming back, right?"

Hiei only gave the fox a small glace before flitting out the window and disappearing into the night.

Kurama gazed out his window, finding the fire demon had long since run away leaving nothing but his passing glance behind.

---

The gentle Tokyo breeze brushed underneath Hiei's cloak as he flitted from tree to tree, the ward that usually covered his Jagan eye gripped tightly in his hand. A slight purple glow could be traced from tree to tree as Hiei used his Jagan to reach his current destination, Yusuke's home. A slight thud emitted from a sakura tree outside the spirit detectives bedroom window as Hieis heavy boots made contact with the trees thick bark. Leaning forward on the branch, Hiei intended to knock on the glass of the window but instead came face to face with the grinning boy. "Hey Hiei, I thought that thud and purple glow might be you."

Yusuke chuckled as Hiei "Hn'd", pushing him to the side as he entered the room through the narrow window. "Detective."

Yusuke stopped chuckling, a friendly smile plastered across his face. "What can I do for ya' shorty?"

Hiei growled at the use of the group nickname for the short fire demon. It had been nearly 5 year's since Yusuke and Kurama had returned to the human world from the makai, and in the short time they had not seen eachother Hiei had actually grown several inches and was now nearly as tall as yusuke. Giving the detective his trade mark glare, Hiei mad a small motion with his right hand to the Katana strapped around his waist. "Am I going to have to casterate you detective?"

Yusuke gulped, sweatdropping as he held his hands up in defeat. "Fine, I won't call you shorty anymore!" Another glare. "Geez! Stop staring at me like that! Now to important matters," Yusuke leaned against a nearby wall, pulling a pack of cigarettes from his back pocket. "I know you wouldn't make a trip all the way here to see me without anything important to say." Yusuke raised a eyebrow qustioningly as the fire demon chuckled.

"Your getting smart detective." Yusuke smirked past the cigarette in his mouth as he cupped a lighter in his hand and lit the tabacco filled stick, "I came here to ask you a favor."

Yusuke again raised an eyebrow, pulling the cigarette from his mouth momentarily to blow out the smoke that had built up in his lungs, "A favor? That's a first."

Growling in agitation Hiei through the detective another glare, daring the younger man to speak. When Yusuke had remained silent Hiei continued, " I want you to watch over Yukina for me. Make sure she lives her life to it's fullest, and if the idiot gets near her...Kill him."

"As much fun as it seems Hiei, Im pretty sure this is your job."

Hiei's gaze fell to the ground. "Im leaving Yusuke. And Im not coming back."

Yusuke's mouth fell open in shock, the cigarette falling from his lips and onto the floor. " What do you mean your not coming back?!"

"It's just as it sounds. I'm not coming back." Hiei turned his back on Yusuke, placing his left foot onto the window sill as he began to hop out the window.

"Will we ever see you again?"

Hiei looked at Yusuke, His eyes filled with the pent up emotions of his short, tormented life. "..No." With that Hiei hopped out the window.

---

Yusuke paced around his livingroom, his heart racing with the posibilities of what he should do. A minute earlier the detective had felt a suspicious sudden rise and then fall of Hieis spirit energy. Gently raising his spirit energy Yusuke scoped the area around his home, searching for any trace of his friends missing Ki. Finding a faint trace of Hiei's ki, Yusuke rushed from his home and towards his friend. "Hiei! Please be alright!"

When Yusuke arrived at the spot where he had traced the fire demons Ki, he took a step back in shock. Laying in the dry grass of the abandoned feild was Hiei's limp, lifeless body, his own Katana piecing his heart. Falling to his knee's in shock, Yusuke crawled to his fallen friend. Scooping the dead fire demon into his arms, Yusuke cried. Sometime into his sobbing, Yusuke opened his closed eyes when a piece of paper brushed against his cheek. Removing the piece of notebook paper that had been taped to the handle of the Katana, Yusuke allowed his eyes to read the note.

_Everyone,_

_By the time you get this, I will be dead. I have no doubt in my mind that the first one to find me will be the detective since he is the last person I talked to. Now, Listen carefully.  
I want you all to take my body, and toss it into the makai. Once you leave my body, never look back, and never come back._

_I am a coward. This charade I have been putting up has lived long enough. I am not tough, and I do not deserved to be loved.  
When my people abandoned me 100 years ago, I wish they had killed me. To spare me the pain I went through the rest of my life._

_Yukina, I will tell you the truth. Your brother truley is dead. Now, anyway. I'm sorry you never got the chance to live with the brother you wanted._

_Detective, Fool...Your strong no matter what I said. Keep fighting,  
If not for yourself or your families, but for me._

_Kurama...I truley did love you but you rejected me. I just wanted you to know I did come to accept this, and you helped me more than you thought these last few years..._

_Hn, Baka fools crying over a lost cause._

_Hiei_

Yusuke had to several times stop and whipe the tears from his eyes as he read the note Hiei had left behind. He was furious with Hiei for deciding that commiting suicide was his only way out, but not only that, He was furious with himself for not recognizing what Hiei had meant when he had talked to him just an hour before. Gently rising to his feet, Yusuke craddled his fallen friend in his arms and headed for Genkai's temple.

---

Kurama awoke with a jolt from his uneasy sleep, raising his head from his folded arms to look around his room. Since his mother had died, Kurama had moved in with Kuwabara and Yukina at genkai's temple. Leaning back in his chair, Kurama took in deep breathes as he wiped the sweat that had gathered around his brow. Closing his eyes in order to calm his head as well as his unsettled stomach Kurama sighed, whispering under his breathe. _"I'm sorry Hiei."_

---

Yusuke, Kuwabara and the rest of the group were huddled outside the door of the foxes room debating on whether they should try talking to him or not. When Yusuke had called Kurama from his cellphone to tell him what had happened, the fox had fallen into deep state of depression. The next day when Yusuke read aloud Hiei's note to all of them the Fox had snapped, rising from his seat on the floor and walking to his room in a comotose state. A day had passed, and no one had heard any sound coming from the foxes bedroom.

Deciding that they needed to check on their emotionally hurt friend, the group had gathered themselves outside Kurama's bedroom.

Taking a deep breathe, Yusuke pushed the door open startling his redheaded friend.

"Oh, Hello everyone." Kurama greeted, flashing a fake smile to everyon who entered the room.

"Kurama." Kuwabara began, taking a step towards his friend so he could place a comforting hand on his shoulder. "You have to cheer up."

Kurama's eyes widened slightly, but the look of suprised quickly faded as he turned his gaze away from his friends. "I'm perfectly fine."

"No your not Kurama."

Kurama choked slightly, tears whelling up in the corners of his eyes. "Do you expect me to be? I killed Hiei."

Yukina gently grabbed Kurama's hands. "You didn't kill my brother Kurama. He killed himself to escape the pain."

Tears now freely flowed down Kurama's cheeks, "The pain I caused him Yukina."

Yukina violently shook her head in protest. "No! He said it himself, that it was the pain of his past that drew him to do this. He just wanted to rest. To ease the pain of his childhood. If anything you gave his last few years joy Kurama, In a way...He was thanking you."

"Yukina..." Kurama's eyes shook, tears still staining his cheeks. "Thank you."

Yukina smiled, craddling the sobbing fox in her arms. "No...Thank you Kurama. For easing my brothers pain, and giving him happiness."

---

End


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